#WDYTMS May List
"Why didn't you tell me SOONER?!"
One of the best things about being an insomniac is how it leaves you with a lot of time to research things.
One of the worst things about being an insomniac is that, as the clock marches onward, your brain isn't useful enough to research anything of import.
Thus I am left with hours late in the day where my neurons are still going off like pop rocks in ginger ale... but they're firing about things like elegant-yet-inexpensive throw pillows or super moisturizing sea salt scrubs or the ideal beach bag or the best tank top on earth.
Combine this habit with the following traits...
- problem-solving addict
- lifelong magazine junkie
- product nerd
- mile-wide, foot-deep trivia knowledge
... and suddenly you've got Meg, Recommender of Things.
Often when I recommend things to people, they say, "Why didn't you tell me about <thing> sooner?"
(None of these are affiliate links. I do this for the love.)
Arm and Hammer Advance White Extreme Whitening Toothpaste: No joke, this toothpaste has been mentioned by multiple toothy celebrities AND friends of mine AND random beauty writers who have lovely white teeth. My teeth are not perfectly white, but I believe yours can be... and this, apparently, is what to use. I'd never have believed the consensus unless I'd read it all myself.
Salux Nylon Japanese Wash Towels: Have you ever wanted to scrub yourself into glowing oblivion, but didn't know just what to use? HERE YOU GO. I love a good oily salt/sugar scrub, but they leave such a residue in the shower I fear I'll give my husband a broken hip. I love loofahs and brushes, but I can't just chuck 'em into my washing machine when they attempt to create a new person from the dead skin I've liberated.
Gross? Yes. But this is exfoliating for badasses.
Get Some Zzzs No. 5 Rest Herb Tea: Sure, you could drink Sleepytime Tea (or the Sleepytime Tea Extra... but can I say that "extra" is the last thing I want to be when I'm trying to sleep?) like the average person, or you could get THIS stuff, and fall asleep 50% faster. That's not a scientific number. It's just how it feels. I don't fall asleep, people, yet this stuff actually manages it sometimes, and without a Benadryl slow-motion moment if you have to get up to pee, or the need to block out nine hours in your schedule.
Tatine St. John's Wood Soy Candle: This candle smells exactly like fireplace or campfire smoke in the distance, which for my money is one of The World's Greatest Things To Smell. It's not cheap, but if you burn it for an hour or so a day when you get home, your immediate surroundings will feel entirely more serene and cozy... and you don't even need a fireplace OR a Girl Scout with a basket of kindling.
Glamglow Supermud Clearing Treatment: If your face is in danger of violating OPEC regulations, slap on a thin layer of this stuff and prepare to be both disgusted and amazed. Again, it's not cheap, but a dab will do ya for your whole T-zone or a giant errant blemish. If you have ragingly dry skin that doesn't produce oil, why are you still reading this paragraph?
LANEIGE Water Sleeping Mask: Oh, hey, dry person. Thanks for moving on. This is for you. I've tried a lot of sleeping masks over the years (Korres, Philosophy, Fresh, Dr. Jart, etc.) and a blessedly thin layer of this magic before bed, and you're going to wake up feeling more hydrated and soft than you normally do (because you insist on sleeping on your face, you dork). It's not going to stain your sheets or goop around. It's just like putting on a more committed, passionate moisturizer.
TIMEX Easy Reader 35mm Stainless Steel Watch: I know what you're thinking. A TIMEX, Meg? That's your big recommendation for my life? LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING. This watch is a watch I have bought over and over since I was 10 years old, and I only buy it again when I lose it. And guess what? I don't have to cry when I lose it, because it's SO CHEAP. Here's why I love it:
- Simple. Elegant. Retro, yet modern. Cheap, yet chic. This is a watch your Grandpa might have worn OR a designer who hates clutter and fuss and refuses to spend more than $60 on anything that isn't a chair
- It fits loose enough to feel casual, but tight enough that you won't accidentally fling it at someone like you might with a more generous band (don't ask me how I know)
- Lights up like the damn fourth of July when you need to see the time in the dark
- It has a gentle, audible ticking, which is like having a Life Metronome(tm).
- It does not track your heart rate or your steps, so it can't shame you
- Unlike my glorious Movado Bold watch, I don't weep when I whack it on the doorframe because I enter a room already talking with my arms
You really can't break it. Honest. I've been in car accidents, major falls, and at least two lifeguard-requiring incidents with these watches and they KEPT ON TICKIN'.
(And no, correlation ISN'T causation, tyvm.)
That, my friends, is May.